i need you to dance the night away.
currently listening to - shan hu hai (:
back to blog once again :] sorry for not updating. i know that you all will be sick and tired to visit my blog if i don't update again. *bhb* haha.
didn't have mood recently to blog, i was like a sudden change of mood. hais, suffering from depression recently. feel like dying so much. and i always have a broken smile once i smile. my life was like meaningless. i may act as if i'm alright but actually i'm not. i would act as if nothing had happened in front of my family, cos i don't want them to worry about me. i would act as if nothing had happened too in front of you guys, cos i don't want you all to be sad because of me. my life is meaningless, totally meaningless. there's no point for me to live in this world at all. i've no mood to study. even if i want to sleep, i can't have a good night sleep. like yesterday, i had difficulties sleeping well. i keep having nightmares and so on. and i would cry all of a sudden in front of you all.
i'm sorry. you all may think that i'm mad or what so ever, i don't care. this is my life. i live in this way. i've no ways to change it. i may laugh all of a sudden, quiet all of a sudden and stare at one place not moving all of a sudden. i don't know why. thanks for all of you who cared for me, emilia keaii* i'm alright. thanks for cheering me up. and all others who had asked about me, thanks so much. i'll try to concentrate on my studies. but i don't know why, i would feel like crying all of a sudden. *sighs* what had happened to me. i had been like this ever since tuesday. till now. i still had this kind of feelings. sorry if my words had hurt you all, i would try my very best to use my normal tone to speak to you all. if my words had hurt you all, i'm really very very sorry. i don't want it too. i'm sick and tired of everything in my life. i had lost interest in everything. i don't want this to happen too. hais.
well, changed my layout again. to everything black and white. i think it suits my mood alot duh. changed the song now too to a techno song. hope that you all like it. give me comments about my new layout please. i would appreciate it if it's a nice comment. haters in my blog please kindly fuck off and thank you. staying back tomorrow for my guitar lessons. anyway i had went for my chinese orchestra lesson on thursday, the instrument i'm playing was erhu. hope that i can learn it well. eddie kor chose that too, in the end the teacher asked him to change instrument. i was like wtf, thought you asked us to choose the instrument we like derhs norhs? and there was a bitch in my erhu lessons. haolian big fuck arhs? you can play erhu is your problem don't need to haolian in front of us derhs okay. and our class is 1C so what? you have to be so damn shock der mehs. diao lorhs. -.-"
love eddie kor, alfred di, and jiaxin nuer loads now <3 mwarhs you all. thanks for making me to laugh and smile at times. if not i would be a lonely girl sitting at the corner. changing seats again. i'm so stressed up recently. so many subjects to study on. and i was like blurred, any homework this week? i don't know. see how worst am i now. i don't wanna change seat. this seat is nice and perfect for me already. why should i change? teachers can you all please stop complaining about us talking and talking? GO AND WATCH I NOT STUPID TOO PLEASE. can't you all think of our feelings? once we had changed our seat to where we don't like, we would had lost interests in studying. idiots.
went to yum cha to eat dim sums on friday. took a few pictures. take a look at my smile. it's so fake. i had already tried my best to have the nicest smile in my photo. but it's still so fake.
current friendster primary photo. love it*
pretend to have a twin, an evil twin. look at the broken smile.
current msn display picture. it's really hard for me to give up =
broken broken broken, fake fake fake.
if only i could cry in front of you,
and tell you how i felt.
but it's impossible.
totally impossible.
you won't understand my feelings.
i love you and you love her.
it's a complicated thing.
no one would ever understand.
NO ONE*
back to blog once again :] sorry for not updating. i know that you all will be sick and tired to visit my blog if i don't update again. *bhb* haha.
didn't have mood recently to blog, i was like a sudden change of mood. hais, suffering from depression recently. feel like dying so much. and i always have a broken smile once i smile. my life was like meaningless. i may act as if i'm alright but actually i'm not. i would act as if nothing had happened in front of my family, cos i don't want them to worry about me. i would act as if nothing had happened too in front of you guys, cos i don't want you all to be sad because of me. my life is meaningless, totally meaningless. there's no point for me to live in this world at all. i've no mood to study. even if i want to sleep, i can't have a good night sleep. like yesterday, i had difficulties sleeping well. i keep having nightmares and so on. and i would cry all of a sudden in front of you all.
i'm sorry. you all may think that i'm mad or what so ever, i don't care. this is my life. i live in this way. i've no ways to change it. i may laugh all of a sudden, quiet all of a sudden and stare at one place not moving all of a sudden. i don't know why. thanks for all of you who cared for me, emilia keaii* i'm alright. thanks for cheering me up. and all others who had asked about me, thanks so much. i'll try to concentrate on my studies. but i don't know why, i would feel like crying all of a sudden. *sighs* what had happened to me. i had been like this ever since tuesday. till now. i still had this kind of feelings. sorry if my words had hurt you all, i would try my very best to use my normal tone to speak to you all. if my words had hurt you all, i'm really very very sorry. i don't want it too. i'm sick and tired of everything in my life. i had lost interest in everything. i don't want this to happen too. hais.
well, changed my layout again. to everything black and white. i think it suits my mood alot duh. changed the song now too to a techno song. hope that you all like it. give me comments about my new layout please. i would appreciate it if it's a nice comment. haters in my blog please kindly fuck off and thank you. staying back tomorrow for my guitar lessons. anyway i had went for my chinese orchestra lesson on thursday, the instrument i'm playing was erhu. hope that i can learn it well. eddie kor chose that too, in the end the teacher asked him to change instrument. i was like wtf, thought you asked us to choose the instrument we like derhs norhs? and there was a bitch in my erhu lessons. haolian big fuck arhs? you can play erhu is your problem don't need to haolian in front of us derhs okay. and our class is 1C so what? you have to be so damn shock der mehs. diao lorhs. -.-"
love eddie kor, alfred di, and jiaxin nuer loads now <3 mwarhs you all. thanks for making me to laugh and smile at times. if not i would be a lonely girl sitting at the corner. changing seats again. i'm so stressed up recently. so many subjects to study on. and i was like blurred, any homework this week? i don't know. see how worst am i now. i don't wanna change seat. this seat is nice and perfect for me already. why should i change? teachers can you all please stop complaining about us talking and talking? GO AND WATCH I NOT STUPID TOO PLEASE. can't you all think of our feelings? once we had changed our seat to where we don't like, we would had lost interests in studying. idiots.
went to yum cha to eat dim sums on friday. took a few pictures. take a look at my smile. it's so fake. i had already tried my best to have the nicest smile in my photo. but it's still so fake.
current friendster primary photo. love it*
pretend to have a twin, an evil twin. look at the broken smile.
current msn display picture. it's really hard for me to give up =
broken broken broken, fake fake fake.
if only i could cry in front of you,
and tell you how i felt.
but it's impossible.
totally impossible.
you won't understand my feelings.
i love you and you love her.
it's a complicated thing.
no one would ever understand.
NO ONE*
posted by Michelle ♥ at
10:30 PM
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